Training Hell

I am currently in training hell, spending an inordinate amount of time going over the world's most user friendly computer program that I can figure out on my own in a few hours. Its not that I'm so techno savvy that I am above training; no, the program is all point and click, drop down menus, etc. , its really that easy. But I am stuck doing this horrificly endless training this whole week whether I keep bounding ahead or not, cruelly denied access to my desk, my computer (my internet, though I'm totally sneaking at the moment)...I am reduced to constant doodling, most of which is ending up on my body, no doubt seeping poisonous toxins into my bloodstream at this very moment. This is how I deal with boredom; that and staring vacuously into space whilst the drool pools onto the keyboard.

Please someone shoot me now. I realize that in the very long list of potential miseries, this would probably be one of my very top choices were I forced to pick my poison, but it is currently seeming absolutely unendurable.